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Self-destruction is somewhat encoded within our cells; we can only control what we want to and when we want to. Giving something like a drug the power over a person means that the said person has already lost their control over themselves. But you have to know how to deal with a drug addict husband?
There isn’t any philosophical quotient or any biological equilibrium which can make things the way it used to be, but if your partner is into drugs, you can only know what it feels to be on edge on the time. People can only empathise and ask you to cut them off, but the problem is much deeper than just cutting your partner off, although this is the only possible solution in cases where things spin out of hands.
But help can be offered while coping with the fact you have to be with someone who is being preyed upon by their addiction. Life can be bitter, but it stings when you have to face the reality of a love life withering away. You can only handle yourself in situations like these, and strength and endurance are the keywords here.
Related Reading:Turning Point: I Dealt With My Husband’s Drug Addiction by Loving Him Unconditionally
What Classifies Someone As A Drug Addict?
Table of Contents
Substance abuse and relationships don’t go together. Drug addiction or alcoholism have an adverse effect on relationships. But let us point out here that someone who has done substance abuse a few times because of peer pressure or because of curiosity, does not end up being a drug addict.
So how does a drug user become a drug addict? Let us tell you.
- A person who becomes dependent on substance abuse for happiness is a drug addict
- He has intense cravings for drugs
- His tolerance levels hit a low when he is denied drugs
- He has withdrawal symptoms like shivering and anger
- He loses his senses completely and indulges in risky behaviour when on drugs
- He gets into financial troubles because of his habit
- He only maintains relationships with people who indulge his drug addiction
Statistics show 21 million Americans have some kind of addiction and 90% of addicts started taking drugs or alcohol before they were 18. The American Addiction Centre website writes: Many of these adults (addicts) are involved in some type of cohabiting relationship, and these partners are feeling the painful repercussions of alcohol or drug abuse. Whether this relationship involves marriage, a domestic partnership, or a more informal living arrangement, substance abuse affects everyone in the home, not just the individual who is addicted. Effective therapeutic interventions involve both partners as well as their children.
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How To Deal With A Drug Addict Husband
It will obviously be hard for you to keep things together. The fight will no longer be with your partner, it will also be with your own conscience. You could be thinking, “My husband is doing drugs behind my back, how can I help him?”
This long battle can only be fought when you realise how strong you are.
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All you can do is gather all of it and fight every situation head-on. Probably you will be the only saving grace in the relationship, but if it affects you to the point where you can no longer endure, it is advisable that you consider rehab for your partner.
Here are five ways you can deal with your husband’s drug addiction.
1. Get as much as support you can find
Emotional support can get you through the long and harrowing nights.Your friends and family should be there for you and your partner. In this way, you can have a team of your own to provide emotional support which you will be needing. The support must not be there for the sake of empathising, so be very careful while choosing your support.
There should be no space for judgement or prejudices in this support. Even if that support boils down to a single person, rely on them. You will often feel weak and morally frail; this is precisely when you need to call your support system up and vent as much as you can.
You can also take the help of online forums where you can even find like-minded people to talk to. These forums are usually safe places made and curated by people who have or are going through a similar situation. Your partner’s addiction is not on you, so you should be as transparent as possible for the sake of your mental health.
2. Clear your conscience
You should make it a point to assess every step so that it helps you clear your conscience. You might end up blaming yourself for not looking out enough for your partner. If you are blaming yourself, then stop doing that right away. Their drug abuse is not on you. Your conscience will be on the verge of sanity so be there for yourself as much as you are there for your partner.
Even if you decide to leave them, you must always find a rational way of telling yourself that what you did was right at that point. Never jeopardise what’s left of you before it’s too late. Your conscience can only be clear once you are transparent enough to realise what you are doing is for the greater good. Then only you can help your husband get out of substance abuse.
Related Reading:8 Ways You Can Help Your Partner Get Over Drug Addiction
3. Join a support group
Surround yourself with people who can understand your situation.Support groups or group counselling often happen in various places. Try to look these contacts up online and don’t hesitate to speak out about your problems.
Help is there if you need it. But always remember that you are responsible for your own mental health. Similarly, you do what’s necessary, because your partner will need help, especially from you.
If both of you can join a support group and go to their sessions regularly then it will help immensely. With like-minded people who want to start life afresh, you will feel motivated.
4. Always be ready to act on your intuitions
Can a marriage survive drug addiction? Yes it can provided you use your intuitions. Intuitions can never be wrong when your situation itself is compromising your partner.
If your intuition tells you to do something, then there must be a good reason to go with that. Your partner is at stake and so are you, so don’t hesitate to do what needs to be done.
If you feel that your partner’s fallen back on drugs despite rehab giving him a clean cheat, don’t bother to confront him. Just use your intuitions and go ahead and do what’s right.
5. Stay motivated
Giving up on your partner is easy but holding on is tough. When you love your husband you should motivate him and stay motivated yourself that there is light at the end of the tunnel.
There are some things that you need to do to stay mentally and physically motivated. The belief that you will find the right way to deal with your drug addict husband is a good starting point. Diet plays a vital role in situations where it can drain you easily.
Try to include a lot of fruits and salads in your diet. Eat healthy because this helps you to be prepared for any dire situation which is physically and emotionally demanding. Encourage your husband to meditate and do yoga with you.
Is It Wrong To Divorce Or Break Up With A Drug Addict?
The hardest thing to do is live with a drug addict. Because life plays on in a loop then – substance abuse, rehab, getting home, heading back to substance abuse. Those husbands, who are self-motivated enough and feel what their wives are going through, can break this cycle of going back to drug addiction and they finally come out clean.
Studies in the US show that a lot of divorces take place because of the partner’s inability to cope with substance abuse. Having a husband who is into drugs could mean an unhealthy atmosphere at home. It means children are perpetually scared of their father’s behaviour and they have to take up extra duties (like doing chores or earning money) because their father is irresponsible and they also face extreme financial issues.
Can a marriage survive drug addiction? There is no guarantee it will because of the adversities but often it does survive despite all odds.
In a situation like this there is nothing wrong in breaking up with or divorcing a drug addict. There is this much you can take but not more than that. Substance abuse and relationships are a recipe for disaster.
In case you need help you can call here:
You can call the Addiction Centre Helpline at (855) 418-6672
Use theSAMHSA Treatment Locator or call1-800-662-HELP (4357)
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The earlier an addiction is treated, the better. Express your concerns honestly. Emphasize that you care for the person and are worried about their well-being. Offer specific examples of your loved one's drug-related behavior that have made you concerned—and be honest about your own feelings.What is the most effective way to deal with addiction? ›
- Set a quit date. ...
- Change your environment. ...
- Distract yourself. ...
- Review your past attempts at quitting. ...
- Create a support network. ...
- For more information on finding an effective path to recovery, check out Overcoming Addiction, a Special Health Report from Harvard Medical School.
As drinking or drug use gets worse, it starts to take more and more time away from the couple, taking its toll by creating an emotional distance between the partners that is difficult to overcome. These couples also report that they fight and argue a great deal, which sometimes can become violent.How do you get someone to stop being addicted? ›
- Admit There Is A Problem. The hardest part to recovery is admitting you have an addiction. ...
- Reflect On Your Addiction. ...
- Seek Professional Support. ...
- Appreciate The Benefits of Sobriety. ...
- Identify Your Triggers. ...
- Change Your Environment. ...
- Exercise. ...
- Accept The Past.
Be clear in what you want to communicate to them, and don't hesitate to bring up your own feelings about the situation—in a calm way. In fact, saying how you feel is often a good starting point. Tell your loved one how it hurts and worries you to see them addicted to drugs and how you fear for their safety.How do you live with someone in recovery? ›
- Keep lines of communication open.
- Don't blame or demean.
- Encourage involvement in support groups.
- Be available and supportive, but don't dwell on the stressful situation and pester about how they are coping.
- Remember that laughter and humor relieves stress.
- Learn to Set SMART Goals. ...
- Build Habits to Stay Busy. ...
- Sweat it out. ...
- Cut out toxic relationships. ...
- Utilize support systems. ...
- Practice positive self talk. ...
- Adopt a pet. ...
- Walk away from stress.
Peer pressure is a strong factor in starting to use and misuse drugs, particularly for young people. Lack of family involvement. Difficult family situations or lack of a bond with your parents or siblings may increase the risk of addiction, as can a lack of parental supervision.How does addiction affect the brain? ›
In a person who becomes addicted, brain receptors become overwhelmed. The brain responds by producing less dopamine or eliminating dopamine receptors—an adaptation similar to turning the volume down on a loudspeaker when noise becomes too loud.Do addicts know they are hurting you? ›
Having an addiction is hard enough, but making those you love suffer from your addiction is even worse. Addicts can see your struggles and they know when they are the cause. They don't want to hurt you. To cope, some addicts find solace in distancing themselves to avoid hurting anyone else.
- Dodge the Defensive. ...
- Step Away From the Situation to Cool Down. ...
- Always Fight or Argue Face to Face. ...
- Create Boundaries for A Fight. ...
- Remember Why You're in The Relationship. ...
- Take Care of The Conflict as Soon as Possible. ...
- Consider Therapy. ...
- Take Some Time Apart.
drug abuse, the excessive, maladaptive, or addictive use of drugs for nonmedical purposes despite social, psychological, and physical problems that may arise from such use.How do you wake someone up from drugs? ›
Keep them awake; make them walk around or make them talk to you; Don't give them coffee or try to shock them; If they aren't responsive or lose consciousness put them in the recovery position.How will you help a person to avoid using gateway drugs? ›
- Ask your teen's views. Avoid lectures. ...
- Discuss reasons not to use drugs. Avoid scare tactics. ...
- Consider media messages. Social media, television programs, movies and songs can glamorize or trivialize drug use. ...
- Discuss ways to resist peer pressure. ...
- Be ready to discuss your own drug use.
Removal of drugs from your body – such as using activated charcoal. Administering an antidote (such as naloxone ) to reverse opioid overdose.What should you do if you get drugged? ›
If you can get to a phone, call 911. The police should be able to register your location even if you can't talk. If possible, find a friend to go with you. If you think you've been drugged, do not leave by yourself.